Brian
Scharnefsky

Von Gabriela Hoek 28.12.2023 um 16:05 Uhr | melden

My dear Brian,
Is it normal to feel you around? I have managed to feel more peace and calm about your passing… Maybe it’s because the lights of my house go on all the time and I’m convinced it’s you. How stupid! The Gaby you knew would have never believed these sort of stuff, but here I am getting older and more susceptible to weirdness and energy crap.
Our birthdays are around the corner and it pains me deeply that I’m the only one getting old. Talking to you on Christmas Eve, I mentioned how when we were together we thought of celebrating them together, since they are just 2 days apart. You’d be turning 32, my dear. I’ll light up a candle on your name and will blow the candle for you, I promise. I don’t know how I’ll get to enjoy “my day” two days after, I hate that everyone around me is excited about it and I couldn’t care less. I want to go see the peacocks we never got to see together. I want to hug you one more time. I was so sure we would get to see each other and talk things over, remembering the happy days and be at peace with each other. I forgave you, sweetheart. It’s ok. Luckily you’ve got to open your heart the last time we talked. Soon will be 6 years since our first conversation and gosh, how did you put some spell on me! let’s say it was mainly the jazz talk. I’ve been in contact with your mom, she’s so incredibly sweet and I’m so grateful for her approaching. I also constantly interacting with Nelson on Instagram, we have the language barrier, but hasn’t been a problem yet. My love, I’ll be back to Berlin in july, for you. I’ll sing for you another time.

I miss you profoundly, I wish you were here with the people you loved the most. Jeez this is so surreal and unfair, It makes me sick, but I’ll always honour your memory with music and my good actions.
I love you eternally.